Anal Training and Stretching with a Butt Plug

Anal Training and Stretching with a Butt Plug

If your intention is to make anal sex and toys a little more comfortable, then anal toys are one of the best ways to do this.

Over time, regular use of anal toys and butt plugs will stretch out the anal muscles so that by the time you have sex, the muscles will be relaxed and trained enough to ensure that anal penetration is comfortable.

Best of all, you can do this minimal pain and discomfort, if you follow a few simple rules.

What is Anal Stretching?

Anal stretching is a process where by people use objects like butt plugs and anal dildos to stretch the anal sphincter muscle, which is naturally very tight.

Stretching the anal sphincter muscle makes anal penetration more comfortable and even enjoyable for many people.

Anal sex is just one reason why people engage in anal stretching. Another is just enjoying anal play with toys like butt plugs, which add a little extra fun and sexual adventure to their sex life.

anal stimulation

Some people train to prepare the anus for extra-large dildos and huge toys or fisting. There are many reasons you might be interested in anal stretching. Whatever your reason, stretching out those anal muscles doesn’t have to be uncomfortable for you as long as you do it slowly at your own pace.

The anal entrance and cavity has several layers of muscles, including the sphincter muscles, which is the tightest part of the rectum. This is the main reason why you need to take your time and go slowly when you’re stretching out the anal muscles. It won't happen overnight.

anal stretching

Using an anal toy, or anal training kit each day and inserting it even further into the anus a little more each time is a great way to slowly stretch those muscles but it may still take a while to get them as relaxed as you want them to be, ready for larger anal toys.

Why Do People Love Anal Stretching?

People enjoy anal stretching for a number of reasons but maybe one of the biggest reasons is that all types of anal sex play are still considered forbidden or taboo by many people, which naturally lends some excitement and kinkiness to this type of activity.

sexy lingerie

Also, anal sex play is no longer an activity just for gay men because these days both men and women of all sexual orientations work on anal training so that they can enjoy some anal intercourse and stimulation.

Men enjoy anal stretching because they can prepare the anus for prostate stimulation, which many experts agree is very similar to stimulating the G-spot in a woman.

Prostate Massager

Women engage in anal stretching because it is erotic and kinky. Many women also claim that anal sexual activity provides them with some of the best orgasms they’ve ever had. Double penetration, with simultaneous vaginal and anal intercourse, can be exhilarating.

double penetration cock ring

If you stretch out the anus properly and over time, you will be surprised by how good can feel. Many people who were reluctant at first claim that after anal training anal stimulation has become one of their favorite things in the bedroom.

Undoubtedly, taking your time while stretching out the anal muscles is very rewarding. Some people love the challenge of being able to insert toys even further each time that they play with it, or moving up to larger toys.

This adventure can even become similar to setting a goal for yourself; each time that the muscles stretch out and relax a little more, you can get a little more sexual stimulation during playtime.

Anal sexual activity of all types is quite exciting for both men and women and the more that your anal muscles are stretched out, the more enjoyable the activity becomes, especially with your favourite sex toys.

Safety Precautions

The anus is a very sensitive part of the body so if you want to stretch those anal muscles, you’ll need to make sure that you do it safely.

safety sign

What does this mean? You can safely enjoy anal stretching and any other type of anal play if you follow two very important rules. These rules are:

  • Use a lot of lube each and every time you participate in any type of anal sexual activity.
  • When stretching out the anal muscles, go very slowly and always take your time.

The anus does not self-lubricate as the vagina does, and so anal fissures, tears in the anus are a very real concern. This means that lube is absolutely essential, not just the first time but every single time that you participate in any type of anal play, including stretching.

Most plugs and sex toys work well with both water-based and silicone-based lubes. Reapply lube as you need to. Silicone lube lasts longer which can be great for anal training and anal play.

Your guide to using personal lubricants

However, be careful with silicone toys, they usually require a water-based lube. Silicone and silicone can melt each other and ruin toys over time. Be careful not to store a silicone toy touching another silicone toy too!

Going slowly is also recommended with stretching, anal sex, and using a butt plug. Keep in mind that if done correctly, you should never feel pain even though it might be slightly uncomfortable in the beginning.

If you’re stretching your anal muscles and experience danger signs, like extreme pain, inflammation, or bleeding, you should immediately stop. This could signal that there is another problem occurring. There should be no long lasting soreness.

sore bottom

You can also start out by using a single finger to explore your anus before trying it with a butt plug or small toy. Regardless of the play you’re interested in, keep in mind the two rules listed above and never sway from either of them.

Following these rules ensures that the activity is going to be safe and won’t tear or rip delicate tissues in the anal area, making it much more comfortable for you in the long run.

How Far Can you Stretch?

When stretching out the sphincter muscle, many people are concerned that the more they stretch and relax those muscles, the looser the muscles will become.

However, this is only partly true because once the anal muscles stretch to a certain point, they cannot stretch any further.

rectum diagram

This is exciting for people who love anal sexual stimulation because let’s face it; anal play is a lot more fun when the muscles are stretched out but still a little on the tight side.

It is also easy to know when your anal muscles are as stretched out as they can be as there will no longer be a challenge with stretching out those muscles.

Inserting a butt plug or a new toy and even participating in anal sex will be a lot more comfortable for you without those muscles becoming too loose.

The amount of time it takes varies from person to person. Take it at your own pace, and enjoy the anal activity as you train. One thing is certain. This process always takes time so be prepared for it to happen slowly and over a period of weeks, maybe even months.

It may not always take that long but it could so you need to be patient and allow yourself some time to “complete” your training exercises.

Of course, it is also a lot of fun to go through this process of anal training so you’ll be enjoying every minute of it while it is happening!

How To Stretch Your Anus: Step By Step Guide

Stretching your anal muscles takes time. It can be fun, especially if you take it slowly and enjoy each step along the way. Here are some steps you should take before, during, and after your stretching exercises:

  • Go to the bathroom and try to have a bowel movement. A clean anus is a lot easier to work with and it makes the activity a lot more comfortable as well. You won't have to worry about cleaning fecal matter from your sex toy.
  • Before you begin your stretching, use an enema or anal douche. This allows you to completely clean out your anal cavity, which, again, will make the stretching more comfortable. You may need to have a complete bowel movement after a rinse.

anal douche


  • When using your douche, make sure that the water is slightly warm or room temperature, not too hot or too cold. This will ensure that you use the entire container of douche and clean yourself out the way that is intended.
  • Place some lubricant both inside the anus and on the sex toy you’re going to use, whether that toy is one of your butt plugs or your finger. And remember that the more lube you use, the easier the activity will be.
  • Insert the smallest end of the butt plug or sex toy first and only insert it as far as possible without it becoming painful or uncomfortable. At the start, you may only be able to insert it a few centimeters but that is still a great start.
  • Always use a toy with a flared base, so it doesn't go too far inside you. Take a deep breath and relax your body as you inert the toy. Try to leave it in for a while. A few hours is more than enough.
  • Anal training kits are a good idea, as they have a smaller toy up to large toys so you can change them as you are stretching.

anal training kit

  • Try inserting the butt plug just a little further each day and don’t worry if it takes longer than you were expecting. Eventually, you will be able to insert the entire toy and it will all be worth it.
  • If you feel irritation or uncomfortable at any point, try reapplying lube. Water-based lube especially absorbs into the anus very quickly so you may have to keep adding during the activity.
  • If you ever feel a lot of pain or experience bleeding, stop immediately because this is usually an indication that something is wrong.
  • When you’ve gone as far as you can, always remember to remove the butt plug or sex toy very slowly, the same way as you did when you inserted it.
  • When you are just starting out, try to wait two to three days in between your training sessions; you can decrease that time once you get more used to it.

You should also start out with very small butt plugs or anal dilators because you want to get used to using one of these devices a little at a time. Once you get used to a small sex toy, you can easily move up to bigger toys after some time; again, there is no hurry to do so.

After Care: What To Do After Training

After any type of anal activity with a butt plug, sex toy or penis, you’ll need to take good care of yourself and rest up a lot. The anal muscles can take from three to six hours to get back to their original shape, so treating relaxing is a great way to allow them to “come down” properly.

man relaxing

This means doing whatever you normally do when you’re trying to enjoy some good rest and relaxation time. Anything that allows your body to rest up physically will work, such as reading a book, listening to some music, or lay down for a bit.

With any type of anal sexual activity, including stretching, many people wonder if the use of numbing cream is a good idea.

Some people like them, and some people don't. Whatever you decide, here are some things that you should know about these lubricants. First of all, most numbing creams are either sprays or some type of gel and they work almost immediately.

anal numbing jel

They are useful because they make anal sex and butt plug insertion less painful but is this always a smart idea?

The anus is filled with very sensitive nerve endings, which is why anal sex play and anal stretching is so much fun, but you can also damage the anus if you aren’t careful.

If you are too numbed, you can cause damage and fissures to the anal muscles without even being aware of it and this is never a good thing.

Luckily, most of these numbing creams absorb quickly so if any problems do arise, you should be able to tell quickly.

Basically, numbing lube is a good idea, but you shouldn’t use too much of it, especially in the beginning because pain and discomfort is often a sign that you’re overdoing it, particularly if you’re a newbie to this type of activity.

Try the numbing lube but use it sparingly. You can always use more of it later on when you’re more experienced and your anal muscles are more stretched and relaxed.

Remember that anal sex and anal play is meant to be fun and to feel good. If you’re starting with stretching out and relaxing the anal muscles, you can have a much easier time if you follow the simple rules.

Regardless of the reasons why you are trying anal stretching, it is good to know that accomplishing this goal isn’t as difficult as some people might think.

Erica Cuff

Author: Erica Cuff

Erica Cuff has been involved in the sex toy industry since 2000. Working behind the motto “Sex Toys should be fun”, Erica provides useful tips & advice from years of hands on experience and research with adult products. 

Happily married since 2005, she knows first-hand how our sex lives can become repetitive if we don't give them the time and effort they deserve. If you're looking to spice things up in the bedroom, then Erica is your gal! She lives to cover topics that empower men, women and couples needing inspiration to keep lovemaking exciting and fun.

Her other focus is teaching women how to properly master the “bald man in the boat” to achieve the best orgasms ever (partner or no partner!) Her informative and unique tips, techniques and advice is up there with certified sex therapists and Sexologists, but with the added advantage of her expereince in the adult toy business.

Erica Cuff's Linkedin profile highlights her professional background, experience and training.

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